What I Believe about Discipline part 1

I think I have a pretty old fashioned view on discipline, not just in child raising but also when it comes to criminals. I feel American's have slacked off in this area, which of course is causing a lot of problems in our society. I feel that if parents would step up and discipline their children instead of spoiling them rotten, then the law enforcement's job would be a lot easier. Two summers ago I worked at a day camp for a Tae Kwan do office, I have to be honest I wanted to smack several of the children. I couldn't believe the number of 5 year olds that had game boys and stacks of games. I couldn't believe the number of 9 year olds with cell phones- who used them a lot! But most of all I couldn't believe the amount of disrespect I saw. I know growing up I could be quite mouthy, My mom often tells me the story of how her and my father got called in to talk to the principle and my kindergarten teacher because I had told my teacher she was very stupid and if she didn't start teaching me something I was going to drop out of school. I know we were mouthy back then. There is one major difference I am seeing though, it's the way parents react to children. When I made that comment, although my parents found it amusing they didn't let me know that until I was older. Instead of seeing the humor in the statement, I was shown the rudeness of my comment by enjoying the taste of soap. I also remember one time I was arguing with my mom about cleaning my room (I was older, probably about 8), I told her "no" do you know where that got me? It got me cleaning my room with a very sore bottom from my daddy's belt. That summer I watched some very similar interactions between parents and their children, do you know what I saw those children get? Nothing. Their parents laughed at the rude things they said, they continued to argue with their children when they told them "no". The children learned no discipline, they only learned that they could control their parents, they learned they didn't need to show us respect because they didn't have show their parents respect.
I fully believe in spanking. I am not saying I am going to beat my child black and blue, there is a difference between abuse and discipline. I believe there is a time for spanking and that time is when they out right disobey you. When they tell you no, or when you tell them not to do something and they turn around and do it. Children should respect and obey their parents. There are many Bible verses that say those same words. Ephesians 6:1-3 says "Children obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honor thy father and mother; that it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth" There are also many verses to us parents about how to treat our children with love, and how we should raise them up in the way of the Lord. One of the more well known ones is a verse in Proverbs that says "spare the rod, spoil the child." The Bible promotes spanking, just read Proverbs if you don't believe me.
Many people however approach spanking wrong and forget to show their children love while doing so. I feel that if you do spank your child there are certain rules which you should go by in doing so. The first most important one I use is never discipline while you are still angry. The reason is obvious, if you spank while you are still angry you are more than likely going to spank your child more than needed and have a harder time explaining to them why they were wrong because your emotions will be guiding you. I would recommend sending them to their room, or the corner until you have calmed down enough to talk to them. Which brings me to my rule #2- always explain what they did wrong and why it was wrong in a loving way before spanking. If you just go after them with a wooden spoon (my mom's favorite item) and whack them then send them away that teaches them nothing. But if you sit down and say "Tommy, you know better than to tell me no and lie to me. God wants us to respect and obey our parents and when you lie you aren't showing me respect. I told you not to do ________ (fill in the blank) because it could hurt you and I don't want to see you get hurt. You know there are punishments when we disobey and that is why I am going to have to spank you now. Do you understand?" I really think if parents would use this method it would help avoid useless spankings. My 3rd rule is love after you spank. Make sure you open your arms to your crying child and tell them you love them, tell them again why they had to get the spanking, but make sure they know you love them. My last rule is make sure you know what age to stop spanking. This might be different for each child but I think that by age 10 the spankings should stop and other forms of discipline should take their place.
Just as I feel there is a time for spanking I feel there is a time for using other forms of discipline such as time outs, grounding or taking away toys. Whatever the form of discipline make sure before you discipline that the boundaries have been set. You cannot punish a child for doing something he or she did not know was wrong. This is why being consistent is very important. I know some kids who are very confused and actually very angry at their parents, I honestly do not blame them. Their parents are sometimes very strict and other times very laid back. There are no boundaries set in stone, sometimes it is ok to say a certain word, sometimes they get punished by it, sometimes this tv show is ok to watch, sometimes it's not. As you can imagine growing up in such a home has caused many confusing arguments and thoughts. There have been many unnecessary fights and tears shed if the parents would have just made the rules and stuck with them.
There is one more thing that I think is a very important part of discipline. It's Praise. It's very important for a child to know their value, in a world where nothing is ever good enough, it is hard for children to find their worth. It is equally important for us to praise our children when they are doing something good and right as it is for us to discipline our child when they are doing something wrong. A healthy balance of praise and discipline will make a very confident, well behaved adult.
I am a big fan of Dr. Dobson, in my child psychology class in college we had to read his book "Hide or Seek". Although I don't remember everything in that book I remember it was a great reference for discipline, while writing this post I have decided I need to break it out and reread it. I recommend reading it to help establish a form of discipline for your children. It's about so much more than to spank or not to spank.

What other people Believe

She takes after her dad.

Here's some pictures of Lexi that prove she is her father's daughter

She likes CD's.

She likes Video games

she takes her hands off the wheel while she drives

and she likes to kiss her mom..... a lot. - it kinda looks like she's giving me mouth to mouth in this picture. This is her newest thing, normally she'll grab my ears or my hair and give me the biggest, wettest kiss ever.

get paid to blog

Beth told me about this, I'm sure some of you have heard about it, but you can actually get paid to blog! I started doing it last week and have already completed 14 assignments. It is a very easy way to make money, it doesn't take much time and you get to do what you love to do! Blog! After you sign up with payu2blog they will start giving you assignments. With each assignment you have a key word and a URL to link to that word. Sometimes the words are weird like colon cleanse (yes I actually had this word) other times they are simple like table cloth or pen. All you have to do is use the word in your blog and link the URL to it. The only requirement is that your blog must be 60 words or more and it has to be positive. You don't have to do the whole blog about that key word, you can just include it in your normal blog. The great part is you get paid $5 for each assignment. $5! to blog! How awesome is that?
it Works for Me!

The man upstairs

I have a problem and I'm not really sure what to do about it. The guy who lives in the apartment above us smokes in his apartment. That's fine, it's his business not mine, I don't know if we're allowed to smoke in the building, but I know we're not allowed to have dogs and he has one. Like I said, that's his business not mine. But there are days when he's home that he smokes so much the smell comes through the floor and half of our apartment smells like Cigarettes. Now it's my business. I do not want my apartment or my stuff smelling like we smoke, and I definitely do not want us breathing in his nicotine. So now what? Do I confront him, do I confront the landlord, do I just ignore it? If I confront someone what do I say? I can't keep him from smoking in his apartment, that's his home. He should be able to do what he wants just like I should be able to do what I want with my home. But what happens when him doing what he wants affects me doing what I want? that is the big question in life, the question behind numerous wars and arguments. I know life wont always be the way I want it but there has to be something to keep me from smelling smoke all day. I don't want to be the tenant that complains about everything and I will admit in our previous apartment I complained a lot about stupid things. I've tried to only mention the important things to our property managers here, things like leaky sinks and broken kitchen lights. It's so hard to stay content when you want so much more.

I bet this addiction has doubled in the past month

75%How Addicted to Blogging Are You?

Mingle² - Dating Site

My boring Kitchen

So Ashley's living room has made me realize how boring my kitchen is. I had every intention of making curtains like I made for the rest of the house, but we haven't had the money to look for material. Our whole apartment is painted this khaki color, the carpet is tan, the trim and doors are while. That's the color scheme for every room in the apartment and we were told we can't paint the walls. I don't know if we'd be allowed to paint if we covered it up when we left or not but that's a lot of paint and money that I feel would be wasted since we're only planning on being here a year. So that means all the style has to come from my furniture and decorating. The living room would look nice if we had a couch, right now our "couch" consists of two lawn chairs. The bedroom is OK, it at least has curtains. But the Kitchen... I don't even like to go in the kitchen. Of course this is the room where I do most of my work, the washer and dryer are in there, and of course the oven is in there, so there are my two main chores for the day.
My goal for when we get money is to spruce up the kitchen, this will include curtains, a tablecloth, a curtain for the unsightly shelf we use as our pantry and microwave stand, and of course cloth napkins. Now if I can just find a color I like and material that will make the kitchen look inviting and fun!

Vacation part 2

I had an idea about our family vacation next summer. I was thinking that since my family lives in maine, maybe one of them can start a Maine bed and breakfast and we can go stay there. I figure out of 4 siblings surely one of them can start their own business and afford to let their family members stay there for free, right?! It's not like we're poor pastor's kids or something!

How unhealthy are americans?

The way our bodies work hasn't changed much since they were created but the food we eat has changed drastically. Fast food, easy food, microwaveable meals, eating out, precooked. These words describe most of our diet. Most people know Trans fat is really bad for you, but did you know that if there is less than .5 gram of trans fat per serving they do not have to put it on the nutrition facts? If you see the word hydrogenated in the list of ingredients that means it has trans fat in it. There is a lot we would need to change in America if we wanted to see the obesity rate go back down, see less cancer and disease as well as have healthier citizens. We would first have to start eating healthy to get all the junk out of our bodies, we would probably have to close all fast foods chains and take all junk food off the shelves in store while replacing them with raw fruits and veggies.

A few months ago I was watching a TV show about how unhealthy we are because of choices we have made. This particular guy was talking about the colon and how important it is to keep our colon healthy. Did you know that colon cancer is the 2nd leading cause of cancer deaths in the U.S.? Toxins from the food we eat cause colon cancer as well as other problems. Constipation is the biggest problems Americans face with their colons. With constipation, the toxins are setting in our colons longer than normal and our bodies absorb the toxins. The longer we are exposed to the toxins the higher our risk of disease. Did you know that the average American only goes to the bathroom once per day, where as every other countries average is 3 times per day. Even if you only go to the bathroom once per day you still have 3 meals worth of waste building up, which is why it is healthy to go 3 times a day. The point the guy on the TV show was trying to make was that in order to be healthier we need to detoxify, there are a few ways to detoxify, one way is a colon cleanse. A healthy colon weighs 4lbs, some autopsies have found colons weighing more than 40lbs, John Wayne and Elvis were two of the people mentioned on this show, one had 40lbs of waste in them and one had 60. can you imagine that? you could do a colon cleanse and loose up to 40lbs!! Talk about instant weight loss!

To my Mailman- and mail people everywhere

I've really been feeling sorry for my mailman lately. The news said last night we've had 20 days straight of over 90 degree weather and it's supposed to continue through the weekend. I went for a short walk yesterday afternoon and almost melted from the heat. I can't imagine having to work in it. Especially construction workers, landscapers and people who do majorly strenuous work outside all day- I don't know how they do it. Then I got to thinking about mailmen (sorry I'm not politically correct by using that term) They have to drive around going like 5mph all day, most of the time with no air conditioning and even if they had it why would they turn it on since their windows have to be down in order to put the mail in the mail box. Then you have places like my streets and many streets around where they have to actually walk up to the door and put the mail in the little black mailbox on the wall, or apartment buildings and trailer parks that have cbu mailboxes. That just puts them in the heat a little longer. I hope and pray for people who have to work outside that it cools off a bit soon. 74 degrees would feel wonderful right now.

Lists

My life is made up of lists. Does anyone else suffer from the list disease? I have grocery lists, CVS lists, to do lists, lists for when we go on trips, list of things to accomplish in the next year... Lists are in random places all over my apartment. Where there aren't lists you'll find a pad of paper and a pen. My husband's father was a list maker up until the day he died, I imagine I'll be the same. Eugene and his sister often tell me about how their dad would sit down and right a list of things to do, they say he had the same list for as long as they can remember, he never really crossed anything off, just re-wrote the list. I'm not that bad- I actually do cross things off most of the time.

High school memories

I know this is probably going to be a corny blog, I can't help it. I've signed up for payu2blog, I actually get paid to blog some of these- which is why i have started blogging about twice as much as usual. well, one of my key words is custom pens. When I saw this word I was immediately brought back to my high school times of when using certain pens mattered to me. I had a couple particular pens I loved. The RSVP pens were pretty nice, but my ultimate favorite pen was "Mr. twisty". It was a simple thin pen, that you had to twist to use. it was slim, silver and wonderful. I loved the way the ink flowed and the way it made my handwriting look. Funny, now I don't care what kind of pen i use as long as it works.

Family Vacation

Eugene and I decided we need a vacation. We have never had a vacation, we didn't have a honeymoon (unless you count the one night stay in the Marriott by the airport) and the only time either of us has used a day off from work has been to go visit family. Ashley's blog about going to Greece has inspired me even more- not that we would go somewhere that exciting, we have a child after all. We were thinking just a nice family vacation at the beach would be nice. Maybe we can fine a nice piece of Tampa real estate to rent for awhile, or perhaps just a campground on the gulf coast. I feel like going to the beach somewhere, I don't feel like spending a ton of money and I don't want to go somewhere where there is a lot of stuff to do. I prefer more laid back vacations, what some might consider boring. There are so many good vacation spots, what are some of your favorites?

A Neglected Subject

My husband brought a song to my attention the other day that really killed me. The more I thought about it and the more I looked into it I realized the subject of this song is not talked about enough. People are ignoring it, neglecting it, denying that it is as big of a problem as it is. What's the topic? Rape, Porn, Incest. These are painful topics and I think that is why many of us choose to ignore them. The more I learn the more I realize that ignoring them doesn't make them go away, and doesn't help educate our children in how to avoid these things. The song is Constance. I encourage you to watch the video and listen to the lyrics. To those of you who don't care for that style of music, or have slow Internet providers, here are the lyrics. Please read them or watch the video. This is a real story, you can read what Constance has to say on the website that was created to give victims a chance to speak their mind. This story has touched many young women and other victims of rape and incest. If you have the time read some of their stories, you're heart will break.

But it's not just about Constance. It's about the millions of people who are victims of sex crimes. Rape, assault, abuse, incest, porn. They all hurt. Want to know some painful facts?

• 1 in 3 women is raped or abused in her lifetime.


• the average sex offender has 117 victims.


• 38% of reported rapes are by friends or acquaintances


• 28% are from an intimate relationship- close family member or boyfriend/girlfriend


• 6% is a distant relative


• only 26% is a stranger.


• 1 in 6 children under the age of 12 is a victim of rape


• every two and a half minutes someone somewhere in America is assaulted.

These are just reported rapes, on one site I looked at it said 44% of rapes go unreported. Imagine how that changes the statistics. Please be aware of your surroundings. There are offenders around you. Do not live in paranoia, but make sure you know who lives or works in your neighborhood, or near the park you bring your children to. Please make sure you always keep an eye on your children, and do not let them go to any one's house if you do not know their parents. A great way to get the knowledge you need of your neighborhood is to check out Family watch dog. You can enter in an address and it will bring up a map with the list of offenders around, what their charge is and if they work near by. It's a great resource if you're moving to a new town too. Use it, it could keep your child safe.

If you are a victim of rape I feel your pain. I am sorry that someone has hurt you in such a bad way. Please know you are loved, you are not dirty, it is not your fault. You did not do anything to deserve this pain you feel. God loves you more than you can ever imagine and He is here for you. There are a bunch of websites where you can get help. You can find people to talk to who have gone through the same thing. Please take advantage of them. here are a few:

http://www.911rape.org/

http://www.iamconstance.org/constance.php

http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/ovc/help/welcome.html

http://www.rainn.org/?gclid=CISzvoWYjo4CFR78gAodqF2tYw

http://www.voices-action.org/

And rape is just one of the many sexual crimes being committed every day. Pornography is another silent issue. I know we try to ignore it or think it doesn't affect us. We cannot live like that. We also can't be so naive as to think that pornography is not an issue for Christians. I wouldn't be surprised if it was more of an issue in the church.

Here are some facts about people and porn:

• 17% of all women admit to struggling with porn


• Women, far more than men, are likely to act out their behaviors in real life, such as having multiple partners, casual sex, or affairs.


• 1 out of 3 visitors to adult websites are women


• 9.4 million women access adult websites each month


• 53 % of men at Promise Keepers said they viewed porn in the last week


• 47% of Christians say Porn is a major problem in their home


• the average age of first Internet exposure to porn is 11


• 80 % of 15-17 year olds have had multiple hardcore exposures


• 90% of 8-16yr olds have viewed porn online


• 26 Children's characters are linked to thousands of porn links (including Pokemon and Action Man)

Still think Porn isn't an issue? here's some facts about the porn websites.

• there are 4.2 million pornographic websites (12% of total websites)


• 25% of total daily search engine requests are pornographic


• 8% of total emails are pornographic


• There are 72 million visitors to porn sites annually

And now some amazing facts about the porn industry- ready to get your socks blown off?

• The porn industry brings in $57 billion world wide and $12 billion in the US


• Adult Videos bring in $20 billion a year


• Escort Services bring in $11 billion


• magazines bring in $7.5 billion


• sex clubs bring in $5 billion


• phone sex brings in 44.5 billion


• Child pornography brings in $3 billion

If you are struggling with a porn addiction please know you are not alone. Rest Assure there is help for you too, XXXchurch is a great place to get that help. These are people who love and care about you, and have been where you are. Do not be scared to take the first step to admitting you're addicted.

I hope I have not lost your interest, I know there are a lot of statistics in this blog, but i wanted you to know the truth. To see that these are issues that we are facing in our towns. Use the watchdog to make sure your neighborhood is as safe as you thought it was (mine wasn't). Talk to your children about rape, sex, porn and what to do if something like that ever happened. Talk to you husband or wife and make sure they are aware of how big this issue is. It might bring forth healing from the past or bring secrets out to the open. If that is the case be loving, patient and kind. Make sure they know they are not alone and that they can get help. Know the facts- research these topics more. I didn't even give you any stats for incest so that will give you someplace to start.

I got most of my information from the following websites: http://xxxchurch.com/07/gethelp/index.php, http://www.rainn.org/statistics/index.html, http://www.iamconstance.org/constance.php

Get it for FREE!!

My frugal friday tip for this week is get it for free! A friend of mine at my old church in TN told me about freecycle (www.freecycle.org). If you have never heard of it you need to check it out. It is a yahoo group, with different sections for different towns or counties. You sign up for the one that is near you and you can choose to recieve individual emails or daily emails of all the activity on the group. Here is how it works. If you have something you no longer want you post it on freecycle. Everyone in the group sees the post you wrote and the people that want it email you back and you set up a time that they come pick it up. It's that simple. And since you see what everyone else posts you can find things that you want and email them and go pick it up! It gets even better... If you want something- like poker tables, you post a wanted ad and people who have one that are willing to get rid of it email you back and you can go pick it up! It's great! So far on freecycle i have recieved a booster seat, a toddler swing, a really nice coleman cooler, and an outdoor riding toy. I have gotten rid of way more than I can type on here. This is just a great way to save money!

Check out more money saving ideas here!

insurance- YAY

I have been counting down the days until Eugene's insurance starts. For a year now we have had no life insurance no medical insurance, no dental insurance, nothing. It's been about 3 years since Eugene had any form of insurance. God has been good to keep us healthy and safe while we didn't have it, but lately Eugene has had all sorts of things going wrong. I think he's getting old. His one wisdome tooth often wakes him up or keeps him up half the night, shooting pain through his jaw into his head. One of his wrists is all messed up, it cracks all the time and hurts him constantly. I've got a cough that refuses to go away, and something crazy going on with the bottom of my foot. I sound like an old person complaining huh? I'm not, really my point in this is that I'm excited that we'll have insurance and I am SO thankful to God that he has kept us healthy and safe.
It kills me to know that there are companies who don't give their employees the option of insurance, I understand small ones, like the one my husband used to work for- I'm ok with that. but there are BIG companies out there who don't help their employees. Thousands of people are living without insurance. There's medicaid available, but many people are abusing it and many people are totally against it because of the people who abuse it. Then there are people who really need it but can't get help because they make too much money and the government doesn't take into affect their bills. I just wish more companies would care about their employees the way Hennon group cares about theirs. that's where my husband works. They get health insurance 100% premium paid for by the company, not just for the employee, but their family too. The list of benefits goes on and on. And this is a small company, why is it that huge companies that have plenty of money can't do the same? They already underpay their employees then they expect them to be able to afford insurance? I just don't think that's right.

The Sock Bee

This morning I finally got around to folding my clothes that I had outside drying yesterday. it was the usual stuff, socks, t-shirts, underwear, a couple towels. i always hang my shirts on hangers and hang them on my clothes line (which is really rock climbing rope- seriously it can hold like 80lbs) then my smaller stuff goes on a drying rack. Well, when i brought them inside yesterday I threw the t-shirts over the drying rack until i got to them. Today after folding my last t-shirt i went to reach for a pair of socks when i saw something strange on them. It was a bee. a big fat bumble bee. It had decided to try to sting my sock and got stuck. Where are the digital cameras when you need them?

Presents

Eugene and I were talking about presents the other day, both of our birthday's and our anniversary are in November (or should that be is in november?) Our budget right now is tight, so the thought of motorcycles and diamond rings is out of the question. Too bad, cuz that's what we want! The Blue Man Group is coming to Charlotte November 3rd and that would be an AWESOME present for Eugene, I just don't see how we'd get the money to buy the tickets- they're not cheap. The past couple years we haven't done much, I take that back, one year we did go to a bed and breakfast for our anniversary, it was sweet a big surprise to me too. Other than that our birthdays and anniversaries have been pretty laid back; but this year is FIVE years! I can't believe we've been married five years. I think I deserve diamonds. :) So.. does anyone have any good cheap ideas?

And then there were two

Last night I was proudly showing trying to show Eugene Lexi's new tooth. She had been determined all day not to let me touch it or look at it. He finally figured out a way to trick her into letting him feel. It was very creative; he would open his mouth and say "ahhhhhhhh" while rubbing his finger across his bottom teeth then say "your turn" and put his finger towards her mouth. She fell for it, opened her mouth wide saying "ahhhh" and let him rub his finger across her gums. well he insisted he felt two teeth, I kept looking, as much as she would let me, but I only saw one. So we were in a small discussion all night about if there was one tooth or two. This morning she woke up (still with her fever) and while eating her generic fruit loops i saw two teeth. Yup, he was right, I was wrong. I admit it. If they come out as fast as they are coming in we'll need to take out a payday loan to pay the tooth fairy.

what do you think?

I've been thinking about these products lately, the ones that help you lose weight and gain muscle. See, Eugene and I have both gained some weight since we got married and we're starting to get serious about losing it. I have started running and Eugene, well.... Eugene is drinking a glass of water a day... Maybe that will work, or maybe he needs to try some of this Muscle Milk. I love that name, It's so creative.

Strangest Thing

I saw the strangest thing the other day. Eugene and I had gone to the park to go for a walk and on the way home we drove by the First Baptist Church Family Fun Center. We drive by this place all the time, it seems over grown and no one is ever there. Well this day was different. There was a truck there. And a man standing on homebase of the ball field. Only he had green grass under his feet. I couldn't figure out what it was, or what he was doing. Then I saw the golf clubs next to him. He was practicing his golf swing on the ball field. I just thought that was so strange, not just that there was someone at the place, but that he just happened to be playing golf on a ball diamond. Maybe he got his sports confused, or maybe he is creating a new sport!

scare of a life time

Ok I'll try to make this long story short, I had posted my Viola for sale on Craigslist and had a guy that was interested in it. He said he'd pay with a certified check and asked my my address and #. I gave him Eugene's name and phone # and he got back quickly with more information. Well, one of his emails to me was very strange, saying things about his client messed up and his client was sending me a certified check for $3,800. um... RED FLAG. excuse me, do you trust a complete stranger with that much money? and why are you making $3,800 of a $150 viola? Well this made me ask him all sorts of questions, and he got on Yahoo messanger and started talking to me... that scared me enough. I was telling him that I didn't feel comfortable taking a check or mailing the viola and i'd rather do it in person and he kept going on and on about how his client would be mad at him. (by this point I knew it was a scam and he was sending me a fake check so when i cashed the check and mailed it to him i now owed the bank all that money) I was trying to be nice and get him to understand that I had no proof that he was who he said he was (owner of a music store in Florida) and that there were other viola's he could buy online for the same price. I finally got out of him an address and phone number and looked things up, nothing matched, nothing made sense. All i knew was that some creep had my address. Anyway, I kept telling him I'd return the check to the sender and consider the deal canceled and he kept insisting that I could help him. Then... he called me babe. NO one in their right mind would call a stranger babe, and definatly no businessman. So the Babe thing got me, i went off my rocker. I told him to never call me Babe, that he was being way too pushy and that when the check came I would either take it to the police station or mail it back to the sender. He still kept going for awhile and I finally got him to shut up. Anyway, by this point i wasn't scared that he was going to come after me, cuz I knew he was just some scam person trying to get money. but it was still in the back of my head that he had my address.
Now to the scarey part...
Today Lexi was sitting in her high chair eating peas (her favorite food), and I was in the bedroom folding a load of clothes. I heard her saying hi and looked around the corner. She was staring at the door (which i couldn't see) laughing, waving and saying hi. This freaked me out. was someone at the door, did i leave it unlocked? what was going on? So i walked slowely towards to door. It was closed. It was locked. What was she looking and waving at? It was the computer. our screen saver is a slide show of all the pictures, she kept seeing "the baby" and waving and saying hi. FEW. what a scare.

Keeping up with Baby's Scrapbook

Keeping up with my daughters scrapbook has been impossible. Not only am I trying to make time to make sure the pages look perfect, I'm also trying to scrapbook on a budget, a tight budget. I keep putting everything off, then I'd end up with 100's of pictures that I'd be looking through trying to pick out the perfect 3 or 4. Then I'd spend hours and hours, sometimes days trying to catch up and make a bunch of pages. Finally a good friend of mine gave me a tip that has worked for me. Do one page each month- while the baby is young and you have so much to capture. That way everything is up to date and you're not looking back saying "oh no, I have a whole years worth of her life to scrapbook and no money to use!" As my daughter gets older I might not need to do a page a month, maybe a page every other month, or just her big accomplishments but I know I can't let them pile up or I'll be back in the same boat with a ton of big accomplishements that need to be scrapbooked and no time or money to get it done!



Check out more fun ideas!

Lexi's first cookie

Lexi had her first REAL cookie today. a Chocolate chip one. She loved it, can you tell?

I can't believe my daughter is finally mobile. She crawled all the way from the livingroom to my bedroom today. I'm so proud.

I was discussing briefly with Beth this morning the differences between Children. It is amazing to me how different two children can be! I first met her daughter when she was about Lexi's age. She was walking around, saying some words, eating spaghetti and had a decent amount of hair and TEETH. Lexi, now one, has just started crawling- forget walking, she does say some words and eats spaghetti if it's cut up, but she has no hair and no teeth! Lexi still looks like a baby where her daughter looked like a little girl. I mean look at this picture. how cute?!

What I Believe- part one

So I got on my soapbox ready to tell the world what I believe about some of the questions mentioned in Beth's blog, but I had to get back off. What a pain, I didn't even get to start rambling before I realized I had to think more about what I really did believe and how I could say that in a loving way. There's nothing worse than when I share what I believe and realize someone has been offended. Trust me, I'm not about to ease up on my thoughts and beliefs just because someone else doesn't agree with me, but there is a time and a place to be unsympathetic and a blog just isn't the place!

What do I believe? That's a pretty wide open question so I guess I'll just stick to answering the questions this week.

Global warming: hmm, I really don't think global warming will kill us before Jesus comes back, unless it's part of the tribulation, but I don't remember a seal of burning from the hole in the ozone layer in Revelation. There's no doubt in my mind that we are ruining our air quality, every day thousands of trees are being chopped down to make room for bigger houses when there are plenty of houses on the market that are plenty livable. We drive big, unnecessary SUV's and hummers to places we could walk or ride our bikes to. We throw away thousands and thousands of cans, bottles, Styrofoam etc- I'd be crazy if I didn't think this was harming our world. Our winters have been warmer and our summers have been hotter. So I guess all of this points to Global warming, right? I don't know if we're creating a hole in the ozone, but like I said, i know we're ruining our air and land and if we don't stop and cut down on all the unnecessary things we'll have to face the consequences.

Sharing your faith in the workplace: it's funny to me that this is a controversial topic. I think we are always supposed to be sharing our faith. We don't have to always be walking around with a big sign saying "JESUS DIED FOR YOU" , or "YOU'RE A SINNER AND YOU'RE GOING TO HELL" we don't even have to say any of that stuff to share your faith. People should be able to look at you and see a difference though, we are supposed to be light in a dark world, where there is a light on in a dark room you can see it right? That's how we should be everywhere we go. I believe there are a few different ways to witness to people other than just being different; there is a time for just being outright and a time for building relationships before you actually speak about God, Jesus and your faith. To me it would be more appropriate most of the time at work to build a little bit of a relationship with the person before you just come right out with it. However, if they ask you a question and open the door, you better be bold! And you bet I would share my faith even if it meant I would lose my job. I know it's happened and it's going to be happening more, crazy isn't it? Did you know that in America, the country who claims to put their trust in God, by law schools and work places HAVE to have a special room for Muslims to go pray in? odd isn't it? Americans who trust God can't even say a prayer most of the time, but Muslims are given their own room for praying to their god.



LOVE?! Did you have to go there Beth? I have to say i honestly don't know how I feel about there being only one person for you. I believe God has a special person picked out for you, but I also know that as humans we sin. We sin big and we sin a lot which makes it very possible for us to let the right person go, or pick a different person. Does that mean it's the wrong person? I don't think so. Love, although initially is a feeling, it only lasts if there is commitment. Some days it is a lot easier to love my husband than other days, and I know he feels the same about me, does that mean we're not right for each other? NO WAY! it just means we're human. God still uses us even after we've sinned and He makes things work when we mess them up. Regardless of who you've married, it's the right person for you. Some marriages take lots of work and lots of commitment, others take less but there is NO REASON for you to be scared that you married the wrong person. I'll say it again: if you're married, you're married to the right person.

now about Walt Disney.... I don't know if I want to go there. I'll say this, if I wrote to him I would have more than just the topic of love to discuss with him.

The many, many uses for baking soda

I have been fighting with deodorant for years, I'd find a brand and scent I liked and after a few months it would stop working and I'd start stinking around noon, so I'd switch brands. This went on and on, every few months I'd have to switch brands and scents. I was getting quite annoyed with stinking by noon even when I hadn't done anything to work up a sweat. My armpits were always irritated and just seemed unhealthy. I learned many years ago that antiperspirant was bad for you, it clogs your pores so that you don't sweat; I wanted to get away from this but almost all deodorants have antiperspirant in it. About a month ago I came across this great site that has many healthy, safe, natural tips on everything from cleaning to beauty and cooking. One of the things I've learned from there is all the things you can use baking soda for.

One of these uses was as deodorant, you mix it with cornstarch and pat it on. This has been amazing! Not only does it save money on expensive deodorant, it works wonders! It doesn't make you stink, it doesn't leave white marks on your clothes, and it made my armpits look and feel healthy again!

Baking soda is also great for cleaning everything from the tub, to the fridge and even getting odor out. Not only is using baking soda for all these things frugal, it's natural too!

Here's more ways to save money!

Frugal Friday- no sew curtains

I've been married for 4 and a half years and we've never had curtains. We have never been able to afford them (they are rediculously over priced) and we've never been able to afford a sewing machine.

Recently we moved into an apartment that has no blinds and is right on the ground level next to a fairly busy street; you can see right into the apartment from the road. Being that I didn't want people looking in our windows we decided we needed something either blinds or curtains to be able to have some privacy. We looked and looked and looked and realized even cheap curtains were expensive. Then I got a brilliant idea. My husband and I were in charge of props for the KidStuf program at our old church and many times we needed things that required sewing. Well during that time I had found this brilliant product called HeatnBond Hem and I used it often. They even make an Ultra Hold for when you need it to stick even better than just a hem. You can make just about anything with this stuff, with no sewing, just an iron. So how could I afford to make curtains though? Curtain material is expensive, and how will I get it to hang on the curtain rod, and how am i going to be able to afford curtain rods?

I was already at the $1/yard fabric looking for fabric for another project when I saw this big bolt of very pretty charcoal grey colored material. I touched it. It was perfect! It was thick, soft and a very nice color for $1/yard! Then I recalled seeing little clips that clipped to curtains and had loops to go over curtain rods. Then I remembered I had two matching small curtain rods that used to hang in our bedroom in our old apartment, all i needed was a big one for over the big window. (God provided a matching big curtain rod for just $10 at Big Lots)

So here's what I got, 14 yards of awesome material (i bought the whole bolt , i made 6 pannels for curtains, a dust ruffle to match and I still have atleast 3-4 yards left), 3 packs of clips ($2.50 a piece) and one curtain rod ($10). That's a total of $31.50 for curtains for 3 windows (including rods) and a matching dust ruffle.

I love HeatNBond!!!

Find more Frugal Friday tips here!

High School Memories

I saw this post on Ashley's blog and I'm a sucker for these time wasters (especially when they bring back old memories) so I decided to jump in on the fun!

1. Who was your best friend? Lindsay, Jess and I were pretty much glue all through high school. And of course any of our current boyfriends were allowed to join the group. There was also Jeremy who was pretty much like a brother to me, but we still hung out.
2. Did you play any sports? HA HA HA! is note writing a sport?
3. What kind of car did you drive? I didn't. Sometimes I rode with Lindsay or Ben though.
4. It’s Friday night. Where were you? If I wasn't at Jess or Lindsay's I was most likely babysitting
5. Were you a party animal? Hmm. unless it involved 5lbs of chocolate and rollerskating or watching movies- no.
6. Were you considered a flirt? oh probably.
7. Were you in the band, orchestra or choir? nope, not in high school
8. Were you a nerd? probably
9. Were you ever suspended or expelled? no, but I got detention once
10. Can you sing the fight song? I don't know if we had one
11. Who was your favorite teacher? hmm. I think I had one I just can't think of her name right now. She taught History (my least favorite subject) but she also taught some other classes too
12. What was your school mascot? A Hornet. how exciting
13. Did you go to the Prom? Yes, what a waste of money
14. If you could go back, would you? no
15. What do you remember most about graduation? it was SOOO hot on that stage, and I didn't understand why it mattered what we wore under our gowns.
16. Where were you on Senior Skip Day? Which one? I think we had 3. I went bowling one time, then hung out at my house afterwards with my friends.
17. Did you have a job your senior year? sort of, I had a part time job at a day care. I also babysat
18. Where did you go most often for lunch? The Cafeteria. We weren't allowed to leave.
19. Have you gained weight since then? yah, gained and lost and gained and am losing (a baby will do that to you)
20. What did you do after graduation? that night we went to project graduation, but i left at 3am to ride to VT to see my boyfriend graduate. Later i went to Grace college, dropped out and got married, now I live in NC and have a baby!
21. What year did you graduate? 2000
22. Who was your Senior Prom Date? Aaron McIntyre
23. Are you going/did you go to your 10 year reunion? um, I might. maybe. Don't know if we'll have one! he he.


Please feel free to play along!

Works for me- ultimate stain remover

As a clumbsy person I always ended up ruining my shirts and clothes because I either spilled something on it, sat in something or dripped makeup on my shirts. Once I had a baby stains became an even more popular thing. Through my course of fighting with stains I asked everyone what they used to get stains out, Oxy clean, shout, bleach pen, tide to go... the list went on. I tried them all. Some seemed to work on some things and not on others, some left a strange spot where you put the stain remover on. No matter what I tried nothing worked the way I wanted it to and they were ALL too expensive for my budget.

In one last attempt to save a nice white dress shirt that I had dripped foundation on (and washed and dryed) I asked a lady at work for any advice she might have. She told me to put some dish soap on it, rub it together and soak it over night. I thought it was pointless, but tried anyway. As I pulled it out of the washer I was amazed. The make up was gone! I couldn't believe it. I tried it on some other clothes that had set in stains... the same thing happened. Throughout this year my daughter has created MANY stains on my clothes and hers. I've learned one thing, don't bother with the expensive stain removers that don't work Just use Dish soap! If you catch the stain before you wash and dry it you don't even have to soak it in warm water, you can just put the dish soap on it and rub it together then throw it in the wash. It works wonders!

Find more Works for me ideas at rocks in my dryer.

Forgetful Israelites

When reading about the Israelites in the Old Testament I always wonder how they can be so quick to forget what God has brought them through. They seemed to always been in a cycle: complain about what was going on, serve false idols in an attempt to fix it, got awakened to their sin, watched God provide an escape, praise God for what he did, then complain again. I just couldn't understand how in time it took Moses to write down the 10 commandments they had already forgotten about what God did and were building golden cows to serve!
As I was thinking about the Dr bill today I was amazed at how quickly I had forgotten all the ways he provided! For the first time in my life I realize I was just like the Israelites.
This month has been/is going to be a challenge, switching to this new job is requiring us to get used to a new budget which involves only getting paid once a month- the last day of the month. Since Eugene only worked half a month last month, the pay check we got on July 31st was only for half of a month and is supposed to last until August 31st. As you can imagine, this doesn't work very well. Our already tight budget was cut in half resulting in us being short $500 to pay for the bills we absolutely HAVE to pay. When i first realize this I was worried sick, what can we do so we can pay our bills for the month and have gas and food money? Where can we skimp? Are there any bills we can postpone until next month? Can we sell anything to make some extra money? the list of questions went on.
Well, we came up with a few things we weren't using that would be of some value, a 40 gallon fish tank, our bikes and some formula- since Lexi switched to whole milk the formula was not needed anymore. the aquarium and formula went on eBay, bringing in a total of $128. (PRAISE THE LORD). I put the bikes in the newspaper but no one was interested, then on Saturday at Lexi's birthday party (birthday party blog to come..) Eugene's nephew asked if we wanted to sell Eugene's bike. well, he bought the bike, we threw in the second bike and a bike rack- mostly to get them out of the way. so that brought in more money!
We were so thankful to the Lord that not only did he provide some money to help us pay the bills He also got some stuff out of the already crowded apartment. On top of that we got a letter in the Mail saying that our TN insurance company was going to be sending us a check for $133 since we canceled our policy before it had ended. (we paid for 3 months and only used it for about half a month before we moved).
All it took was one small $220 Dr bill to make me start building my golden cow- worry. Thankfully I serve a forgiving God who forgives forgetful Israelites like me.

lexi's one year old well visit

Today was Lexi's one year old well child visit- her first Dr appointment at the new doctors office. We didn't get to see a doctor, only a nurse practitioner, but she was really nice. Anyway, here is the results of her visit:

1. She weighs 19lbs (10th percentile)
   
2. she's 28 1/2" long (between 25th and 50th percentile)
   
3. her head is 48 1/2 cm (way over 100th percentile as usual)
   
4. She needs to go see a eye dr about her tear ducts getting cleared
   
5. She got 3 shots


Two in the leg

and one in the arm

7. and a finger prick
8. We found out right before the shots that our temporary insurance does not cover well visits so now we owe the Dr's office $221

Yah, she could win contests

The Day My Daughter turned one

Thursday was a pretty big day around here, atleast for Eugene and I, I don't think Lexi could tell the difference. She turned one. Since her birthday party is today, we decided to celebrate just a little on Thursday to give her some practice.

She didn't like the feeling of the frosting at first,

Once she realized there was cake in it and that it tasted good, she couldn't get enough.

We only let her eat half, for fear of her getting a belly ache- not to mention it was 7:45pm.

She made sure to suck every last bit of food off her fingers. Then she had an amazing sugar buzz that we forgot to get on film. We'll be sure to get her sugar buzz from her cake today on film though.

Happy Birthday Baby Girl!

My walgreens adventure

Beth inspired me with her amazing savings at Walgreens, so last night I clipped some coupons and mapped out my adventure for tonight. I got $58.45 worth of merchandise for $20.45. That is a savings of $38.00! Here's a picture of my goodies!

Fighting the sin nature

Today is the big day. Lexi turned one today. unlike other one year olds, she did not get her first hair cut, she did not start to walk, or even crawl. She didn't even get her first tooth. Sure, she's a little behind on those developmental things, but I know her brain is working. Not only does she have a vocabulary of seven words (uh-oh, momma, dadda, more, all done, hi and bye) three of which include signs, I have seen her activly fighting her sin nature. You know, that desire inside of you to do what you've been told not to do.
Today I sat Lexi down on the floor outside of the bathroom and noticed her looking around. This is not unusual, she likes to see what all she can get into. Well, I just happened to have set her down next to the outlet with our cell phone chargers plug into it; this is her usual sitting spot while mommy is going potty. On more than one occasion her daddy or I have told her "no, do not touch the plug" it wouldn't surprise me if she has even had her hand "smacked" for touching them. Well today she saw the outlet, leaned towards it like she wanted to grab the chargers, then stopped and shook her head no and sat back down looking for something else to get into. What a good girl I have. I immediatly praised her for not touching them. She was thrilled that I noticed and replied with a big grin.

Wordless Wednesday-Ocoee River

See more Wordless Wednesdays here