This blog a friend shared has got me thinking a lot about parenting. It's called Motherhood as a mission field. It has a lot of good points, things I needed to be reminded of, things i probably need to remember daily. I don't resent my kids that I am at home with them, but I do get feeling like they are an inconvenience to me.  I get irritated when they act their age and do childish things from time to time. See, for the most part i have great kids, but they have their moments where the actually act like kids. And those moments throw me off and I get irritated.  It's little stupid things that push me over the limit. It's those moments that I need to remember A) they are kids, MY kids whom I love very much. B) I am their mom, I wanted kids so badly, and kids are dependent. They are supposed to be, they are KIDS.  Now don't get me wrong, there are things a 3 and 5 year old could and should be doing alone. like wiping their own bottoms.
But as a mom, i should not feel inconvenienced by my children. I should not be upset that I have to spend 5 more minutes with them when all i want to do is lay on the couch and take  a nap! Being a mom is a sacrifice, sometimes it's more of a sacrifice than others, but we are investing in people. We are helping them become who they will be for the rest of their lives. We are showing them what being a mom is all about. *GULP* We should be modeling Christ, so they can see Christ in us, and then in turn display Christ in their own lives.  I fail miserably at this, most days more than others...
Also, I've been reading a lot of verses about Love lately, what love is supposed to look like. It's impossible to fully love without Christ, if you read 1 Corinthians 13,  it gives you the guidelines for love, it's some heavy duty stuff! no human can accomplish that.  patient- maybe. kind- yah, does not envy, does not boast, not proud, not rude, not self-seeking, not easily angered, keeps NO record of wrongs, does not delight in evil, rejoices with truth, always protects, always trusts, always hopes always perseveres.  I don't know about you, but i have a hard time living up to just one of those characteristics, let alone all of them.  It's only through Christ that we can fully love someone.
I am so glad I love and serve a perfect God who can help me love my children and husband the way He intended me to love them. As long as I daily ask for his help and admit that I cannot do it alone. Which is something I need to remember. It's all quite humbling honestly.